God is Not Here – A Soldier`s Struggle with Torture, Trauma, and the Moral Injuries of War - Softcover

"War is rife with good people feeling shame or guilt for what they did. Scientists are calling it moral injury. Edmonds spent years writing as therapy to treat those wounds. This book is the result. 'By sheer force of will I revised myself. Now I am able to explain myself to myself.' Deep and profound.--Gregg Zoroya

You know Bill Edmonds is on to something from the very beginning of the book, which I think is one of the best to come out of the Iraq war. There are lines that stay with me.--Thomas Ricks, 'New York Times' bestselling author, from the Foreword

Captures an essential lesson about the war in Iraq. Searing and often brutal. As Edmonds' account so telling demonstrates, much more remains to be done.

A truly remarkable memoir. With searing candor and profound soul-searching, Edmonds opens our eyes to the horrible moral ambiguities that he faced. He has no pat answers about living in a space between complicity and moral protest of torture, but the protest that does cry out is that he has lived too long with his own moral anguish. As a nation we must stop distancing ourselves from the Americans who fight on our behalf and start holding ourselves accountable to help them heal.--Nancy Sherman, author of 'Afterwar: Healing the Moral Wounds of our Soldiers'

A wrenchingly honest account of a soldier's inner conflicts in a morally ambiguous war. Working with an Iraqi officer interrogating Iraqi terror suspects, Bill Edmonds got what most U.S. soldiers did not: a view of the Iraq war through Iraqi and not American eyes. That perspective gives a painful but illuminating and necessary lesson on the true nature of America's conflicts in our era.--Arnold R. Isaacs, author of 'Without Honor: Defeat in Vietnam and Cambodia' and 'Vietnam Shadows: The War, Its Ghosts, and Its Legacy'

An intense wartime and post-war memoir. This blunt, taut account, based on Edmonds's journals, addresses the profound ramifications Edmonds's work in the war have had on his emotional well-being. The chapters effectively flash back and forth.

A raw portrayal of Faulkner's human heart in conflict with itself. Part confession and part treatise, I was engrossed by Edmonds' ongoing conversations with Saedi, his Iraqi counterpart who serves as both his good and bad angel. It is commendable that Edmonds even attempts to reconcile right and wrong in his impossible role, but it is also the source of the tragedy.--Brian Castner, author of 'The Long Walk: A Story of War and the Life That Follows'

An important account of how torture is ineffective and can deeply harm those who merely witness it. A must-read for anyone who cares about America's future and the welfare of U.S. service members.--Lieutenant Colonel Douglas A. Pryer, author of 'The Fight for the High Ground'

'I will write my way through this, ' [Edwards says] and he does, with a precision that might help others who remain bombarded.

A powerful and courageous story of a soldier's fight against a policy that ran counter to his own moral code. As a young captain, Bill Edmonds was idealistic, excited to do his part in the war on terror. But his embed with Iraqi intelligence forces didn't go as planned. The unit's interrogation practices were brutal. But when he raised concerns about the tactics to commanders, he was brushed aside. In one of the best books written about the Iraq and Afghanistan conflicts, Edmonds provides a compelling glimpse into this dark world where the ends justify the means, and his own heartbreaking struggle to maintain his sanity in the face of immoral behavior.--Mitch Weiss, Pulitzer Prize winning investigative journalist and author of 'Tiger Force: A True Story of Men and War' and 'No Way Out: A Story of Valor in the Mountains of Afghanistan'

With more than twenty years of service, Lieutenant Colonel Bill Russell Edmonds is a decorated counterterrorism and counterinsurgency expert who has served in various positions throughout the Special Operations community and with other U.S. government agencies. Bill is a native of Southern California and currently lives in Germany with his wife and two daughters.