Southern Fried Divorce - Softcover

Set against the colorful backdrop of New Orleans, SOUTHERN FRIED DIVORCE raucously recounts the author's divorce from “That X”—a classic bad boy—and the unpredictable roles he plays in her life afterward. The book opens with his showing up on her doorstep, in mid-Spring, covered in red and green ribbon, smelling of Jim Beam, and bearing a belated Christmas gift—a home security package in the form of a .38 revolver and a brown puppy. After wondering what kind of ex-husband gives his wife a gun, she gives the puppy back and the adventures with that ex-husband and the brown dog, who are soon inseparable, begin. The hilarious vignettes that ensue include: the rules to Redneck Roulette; post-divorce sex (“Smurfing”); a divorce settlement that includes a bar tab for life; how to teach a dog to drive a Cadillac; getting mugged with her own cutlery; wearing a keg into a football game; instructions on how to cook the best Christmas roast south of the Mason-Dixon line and other fine Southern recipes; and the antics of her infamous ex and the brown dog—two cohorts mythic and so inseparable they performed naked synchronized swimming together at the 1984 World's Fair. Conner weaves together a one-of-a-kind love story that exposes the humility of all human relationships, and shows that the end of marriage is not the end of love.